Something Old, Something New…

But only if you want to!

Wedding traditions used to feel… compulsory. These days though, traditions are more optional. 

As a bride, I remember hearing things like:

“You must cut a cake. You must have a first dance.
You must throw your bouquet. Otherwise it’s bad luck!”

I realised that people will always have opinions (often from a place of love), but it’s entirely up to you whether you listen to them or not. 

When we planned our own wedding, I was dead set against having a cake. I didn’t want to interrupt the party, drag everyone’s attention away from the dancefloor, and perform a cake cutting just because it was “expected”. But still, we felt like we had to — purely to keep other people happy (and to avoid their fear of bad luck). Our wedding co-ordinator cleverly scheduled the cake cutting under the disco ball, flowing seamlessly into the first dance, which gave us a great photo.

Yes…my husband is a Leeds United supporter.

Recently, a lot of couples are ditching traditions and are instead choosing the elements that they actually want — especially in their ceremony with an increase in celebrant-led weddings.

Here are just a few ways my husband and I put our own twist on our wedding day:

No bouquet toss
I skipped the bouquet toss altogether. Sorry, but after spending good money on it, I wasn’t throwing it! 

Not being “given away”
“Who gives this woman to be married to this man?” I’m my own person and I’m not my parents’ property, so no one was giving me away.

Both my parents walked me down the aisle
They both raised me, they both deserved that moment.

No ‘something old, something new’
Honestly, I didn’t have the time or headspace to organise all of that. Instead I decided that my beautiful bridesmaids were my ‘something blue’.

No three-course dinner
We’re foodies, so the food mattered. Instead of a formal sit-down meal, we had 8-hour cooked Asado lamb on sharing platters. People still tell us it’s some of the best food they’ve ever had at a wedding.

The groom had his own entrance
My husband wasn’t standing around waiting for guests to arrive. He had his own moment — parading down the venue drive with Dhol drummers, family and friends.

And my proudest one?

I gave a wedding speech
I love public speaking. It was my wedding day too. I received plenty of comments beforehand: “Oh, you’re doing a speech? That’s unusual…” But I received loads of positive comments after saying how much they’d enjoyed my speech. 

Roasting my husband in my speech.

My point is simple: you do you.

There’s no rulebook you have to follow. No boxes you need to tick, and no “this is how it’s always been done”. None of this should outweigh what feels right for you. A wedding ceremony isn’t a performance for tradition’s sake — it’s a moment that should sound, feel, and look like the two of you.

If you want to keep traditions, rewrite them, or leave them behind entirely, I’m all for it. Whether that means personal vows, a non-traditional structure, a relaxed tone, a cultural blend, or something completely unexpected, I’m here to guide you — not steer you away from who you are.

Every couple’s style, journey and personalities are different, so why shouldn’t the wedding day reflect that? I know it can be difficult to recognise that traditions are optional, not compulsory. As a celebrant, my role is to tell your story. With me as your celebrant, you know that you have full control over your ceremony; to celebrate your values, your journey and your relationship in a way that feels genuine and meaningful.

Just simply…
Your ceremony, your way.